In Which Lateness leads to Weird Happenings
by rabid-bunnies
Summary: Naruto Crack! same brooding sasuke. same worried sakura. naruto after an accident. and a waiting kakashi? sasusaku if you squint.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto.

In Which Lateness Leads to Psychogenic Amnesia

Sunshine and varied chatter filled the streets of the usually serene Konoha. The public clock read 6 a.m. – oh the life of a ninja. Somewhere, a young twelve-year old boy was in-between wrestling his pants on and brushing his teeth, getting ready for a new day. Whoever said being a ninja was an easy task? Uzamaki Naruto: obnoxious, loud-mouthed, madly in like or love with Haruno Sakura, rival of Uchicha Sasuke, so-called genius, and is going to be Hokage one day. Yes, that's the way the story goes. But wait – rewind – here's what really happened.

Dawn barely hit the curtains of a certain blonde-haired boy's flat and where there should be rustling and preparation for the day's rigorous training, there was the soft snoring of child who stayed up late practicing his shuriken training then got caught up watch late-night cartoons. Apprehension that faded into contentment played across the sleeper's features as murmurs of "Get out of my way, Sasuke", "I won't lose to you" and "Sakura-chan is going to make me ramen" were heard. A small smile graced his lips as the thought of his favorite food came into mind and trickle of drool followed in its wake.

It was vague, but Naruto was positive – Sakura was bored so she began drawing pictures. Eager to show everyone, she passed them around. Sasuke, current holder of said pictures, suddenly looked like he was about to implode with laughter, cracked a smile then his face fell apart just like Gaara when using his ultimate defense. What was it that made the Uchiha prodigy lose his face, literally – a lovely artistic vision from a young kunoichi of their dear sensei with fish lips and a hair mole? What has he been watching before he sleeps because in all honesty he should really….

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Coo. Coo. Coo. Coo. Moo. Moo. Moo.

A series of random noises, mostly farm animals, filled the entirety of the room, specifically the part beside his head. Oh dear god, whatever possessed him to purchase the darn clock, he just wanted to strangle it now. Sure, it was cool when he was testing it for future use, but now that it was doing its job wonderfully he might add, it deserved to be flung out a window or flushed. Five more minutes and he would be Mr. Sunshine with bleeding ears, but Mr. Sunshine no less.

Five minutes turned into a full-blown hour. His teammates were going to be more than irritated. An irate Sakura flashed in his mind and Naruto knew it was going to be a bad day. There were worse things on his plate though, he prayed to all the gods pleading they didn't start training without him. Time to go quick-style on everything, hopefully he wouldn't get indigestion or misread labels and end up like that day he became a genin. The boy visibly shuddered at the memory. The things his rectal system had to go through then.

Naruto rushed toward the boiling pot on the stove. Yes, he was late, but that doesn't mean skip out on his ramen. The day he does that would be the day he's official lost it. He had no time as of the moment so Naruto silently chided himself to shut up and swallow.

* * *

Sitting on a rock and waiting was not fun, not to mention an offhanded setting as to what their supposed to be doing. Sakura let out a sigh, drained and frustrated. Naruto not here, elsewhere, doing what – god only know? When he gets here she was definitely going to give him a piece of her mind. It's bad enough their teacher pulls stunts like these and then makes up lame, albeit funny jokes about it, but now him too. Sakura was beginning to wonder if things will ever go right; she knew the allusion lining those thoughts – Sasuke.

"Kakashi, Sakura" he called out, coolly.

No way was the Uchiha prodigy going to wait around for a dead-last that would only pull him down. Team 7 is a ninja team. Training is what ninjas do. Loitering while waiting on others: irrelevant. Screw the fact that one is missing, it was training not a damn mission and Sasuke was going to do what he dragged his ass up in the morning for.

"Let's begin."

The rose-colored blanket swayed subtly as Sakura turned to glance at the masked jounin. As much as she told herself she hated Naruto, reality was Sakura did not. Starting without the obnoxious boy seemed unfair and unjust. She was conflicted between objecting and agreeing. Damn the element called empathy. She hoped he would hurry up and appear. The leader of the team gave a nod toward the raven-haired teen in the corner. It was 7:30. They waited on the other for one hour and a half.

* * *

"Damn it" cursed the blonde teen. His 'late-late-late' sutra had suddenly taken on a sing-song tone with a lack of urgency and more playfulness. Naruto ran toward the door will haste and suddenly found himself on the floor head spinning before descending into the darkness behind his lids.

"Naruto!" a feminine voice exclaimed. Sakura found it odd that even after the team was done with training, the boy hadn't been spotted in the village. That was a long time for him to be dormant. She thought something had happened to him and against her volition her legs had dragged her to his apartment.

"Stupid pig-head" she muttered, "taking forever."

"Naruto!" she screamed again.

Suddenly the door swung open and the one she sought appeared before her, looking a little dazed.

"You jerk; I've been standing here for five – "

He cut her off. "And you are?"

She stared at him like he pulled an Oiroke no Jutsu, her irritation quickly growing.

_Count to ten. Count to ten. Count to ten._

Sakura took a breath.

"Oh my god, who is he?"

At the underlying hint of lust concealed in Naruto's whisper, she turned to see what caught his interest.

Sasuke? She blinked at said boy, confused as to why he came. He simply shrugged, turning to peruse the situation, half wondering what all the ruckus was about.

In her current state of agitation, Sakura failed to notice her teammate's choice of dress but Sasuke being the observer he is visibly deterred his vision while muttering something under his breath.

Naruto of course did not miss the hottie eyeing his publicly displayed torso. "Like what you see?" he drawled sexily.

The pink-haired girl and dark-haired boy eyes widened like saucers. What the hell did he just say? Wait, wait...What the hell did he just imply!

Slowly the pair backed away from the apartment door with extreme stealth so the boy wouldn't catch on. Luckily he murmured something about them staying put as he cleaned up a bit then they could come in.

Taking their chance, the two ran like the wind not wanting to be caught in whatever ungodly thoughts the blonde had running through his mind. The damn boy acted as if he was shot with Ino's Shintenshin no Jutsu.

Sakura gave a visible shudder and glanced to the boy on her right. Both a little out of breath, paused for some oxygen.

"So…" Sakura started once she regained some composure.

The Uchiha survivor remained unfazed then after a brief pause he stated,

"Let's go get ramen."

The cherry blossom all but fainted at his suggestion and could only nod in response.

Together they walked to Ichiraku, trying to forget the horrible experience they had just witnessed.

Meanwhile, a couple blocks away a little blonde-haired ninja in haste to gather up his mess slipped on a puddle of spilt water and was out cold.

End.

Moral of the Day: clean up spills lest something like this happen.


End file.
